workplace etiquette for dummies

With jobs as scarce as they are, it would be a shame to forgo gainful employment as a result of workplace etiquette issues. Sounds like it's time for a workplace etiquette for dummies one on one. Ok, so what exactly are the workplace etiquette issues and who are the transgressors? The type of workplace issue varies from industry to industry but there are some more common etiquette "dont's" include the following:

1. Belching and Burping - Just say "no" -- it's bad taste and needless to say your co-workers don't want to know what you ate for lunch. In fact, the emission of any gas(es) from the body (especially while in the workplace) is an absolutely "no-no". If you don't get this, maybe your company made a bad hiring decision to bring you onboard, that will likely be corrected sooner versus later. Guys are undoubtedly the guilty party here and according to the "little bird", techie guys are more guilty than guys from other workplaces.
2. Hygiene - Just do it. You've heard it all before, "do shave", "do invest in a toothbrush", "do brush/comb your hair", and iron your clothes before going to work. Guys are the culprits here once again. This might have a little to do with why your wife left you too. Get with it gents.
3. lunch - is for the lunchroom. Maybe that's why, it's called the lunchroom. duh. Eat your lunch there instead of your desk, especially if you have your "aunt's special catfish recipe" that the rest of the office could care a less about. At least, if you consume your lunch in the lunchroom only, only the other lunchroom guests would suffer instead of the entire workplace. Guys, you're making us look bad. Get with it.

You would think having and maintaining a job would be a priority for most folks these days. On the other hand, judging from these common workplace etiquette faux paus -- maybe not. For those of you that do like your job, want to keep it and rebelled at home when your parents were having these lessons with you, it would be wise to remember the workplace etiquette items listed above. It almost, seems like that goes without saying such as to make workplace for dummies seem like a far stretch but on the contrary, it isn't that far of a stretch. Follow these unwritten rules and keep your job. Who knows, you might even convince someone to go out on a date with you too! It's worth a shot.